Your Heart is broken and the Hopes, Dreams and Expectations you had for the future have been shattered.
This maybe as a result of a very personal loss caused by a death or bereavement, divorce, relationship breakdown, family break-up, business failure, pet loss, redundancy or ill-health, to name but a few. All losses hurt and cause emotional pain, and those around you say you have to “let go” and “move on”, but they never tell you how to?
No matter how recent your loss, if you feel like you are just “existing” or “coping”, rather than living fully, then the good news is we can help.
What do we mean by grief?
- Grief is the normal and natural reaction to significant emotional loss of any kind.
- Grief can be the conflicting feelings caused by the end of, or change in, a familiar pattern of behaviour.
- Grief can be the feeling of reaching out for someone who has always been there, only to find when you need them again, they are no longer there.
What should be remembered is that grief is individual and unique
So if Grief is normal what’s the problem?
The problem is that while grief is a natural emotion most of what society teaches us about it, and how to deal with it, is intellectual. You can’t fix a feeling using a rational argument – yet our friends, family and some professionals try to regularly.
For example, following a death they may say “don’t be upset she’s out of pain” while the second half of this statement may be technically (rationally) true, it is emotionally barren. They’ve moved the subject away from your feelings and on to those of the person who died. This intellectualisation of grief is so engrained we barely notice it anymore.
We just know when people make comments they are by and large unhelpful or even hurtful despite being uttered with the best of intentions. Over the years of working with many thousands of grievers, the Grief Recovery Method recognises that the 6 myths associated with loss are almost wholly universal.
The 6 Myths
- Time heals all wounds
- Replace the loss
- Grieve alone
- Be strong
- Don’t feel bad
- Keep busy
Sadly our society does not teach us how to cope with our grief. We are merely expected to “get over it in time”. But how long are we supposed to wait for the pain to go away? A month? A year? A lifetime? The truth is that all time does is pass. It is the actions you take during that time that determine how completely you recover. The Grief Recovery Method® teaches you the correct actions so you don’t have to hopelessly wait in pain.
What types of loss can cause Grief?
There are over 43 losses that are considered to cause us to feel Grief, and here are some of them:
Loss linked to Fostering/Adoption/Being in Care
Loss of a beloved pet
Loss of health
Redundancy / Career Moves
End of Addiction
Some Intangible Examples of Grief are:
Loss of Trust
Loss of Safety
Loss of control
Loss of Faith
Loss of Fertility